8th January 2023

Endings, Fitting In and Friendships

Hello Dear Friend,

Welcome to another letter from my heart to yours, apologies for it being a day late, I completely ran out of energy this weekend. I received news that one of my favourite uncles had died unexpectedly on Thursday, just over two years after his beloved wife died. They are hopefully reunited and watching over my cousin as she tries to rebuild her life. It took it out of me a bit, but I have unfortunately reached that age when there are likely to be more funerals than weddings. My heart goes out to all who are suffering from bereavement, my thoughts are with you.

This week’s letter is a mixture of things, a reflection on being just the right size, musings on friendship, and if you need a smile, a short video showing a young girl receiving her first pair of glasses, which will really warm your heart.

Try to do things more often than once in a blue moon…

Humility and Finding your Right Size

I feel one of the reasons I didn’t have the energy to share this letter with you yesterday was that the universe wanted me to share this poem with you. It came via an email from Debbie Danon, which can be found here, and was written in response to a poem called Big, by Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer, which is also worth a read.

RIGHT-SIZED

Debbie Danon, January 2023

What if this the year to learn to be right-sized?

I learned on the playground to

Flinch from arrogance.

‘Please – don’t leave me.

I promise not to get Too Big.’

But the cost, I’ve learned, is dear.

Trading potential for false modesty,

Dampening power with every apology,

Neglecting my impeccable edges

With every hedge.

But then I remember

What the rabbis knew.

They stretched wide a red silk thread.

At one end: Arrogance.

At the other: Not humility – but

Playing Too Small.

They knew playing small was just arrogance by a different name.

Placing comfort above contribution.

Our gifts withdrawn from the world,

For the price of fitting in.

‘What if holding back is stealing?’

So in the middle, they placed a pair of right-sized shoes.

Yours.

Mine.

The right-sizing that awaits us all.

What, I wonder, will it take for you to grow into your right size?

The one that seems

Impossibly large, and

Obnoxiously loud?

Clownish as these shoes seem now, prone to stumbling,

At first you’ll feel the fool.

Some People will have Things To Say.

Some may even walk away.

(In this modesty-mad world, they’re yet to clock

that claiming your shoes

does nothing to keep them from theirs.)

But every now and then you wake up to the truth.

That it's the world that's wrong - not you.

These too-small shoes will no longer do.

So take your credit where it’s due.

And when no-one offers it – give yourself a spoon daily.

Take your space

Trading in the apologies for gratitude.

Minimise your emotions no more –

They too deserve to expand to the full.

Fill your circle with champions

And learn to see yourself with the wonder of their eyes.

And when you hit your stride, and weather whatever,

Give up the surprise.

When those shoes once vast grow snug,

Be sure to celebrate well.

Acknowledge yourself, and your people, and the view.

Until another pair of shoes calls to you

Between arrogance and avoidance

On that red silk string…

You Are Needed.

And this is no time, no world,

For stealing.

May You Be Blessed

I came across this poem whilst reading Sunday Musings from The Cottage, a delightful substack written by Diana Butler Bass. This week’s musings was about how friendship is at the heart of so much goodness in our lives, and she contemplated the connections and habits surrounding our friendships and communities that we have all lost during the pandemic.

Sunday Musings

May you be blessed with good friends.
May you learn to be a good friend to yourself.
May you be able to journey to that place in your soul where
there is great love, warmth, feeling, and forgiveness.
May this change you.
May it transfigure that which is negative, distant, or cold
in you.
May you be brought in to the real passion, kinship, and
affinity of belonging.
May you treasure your friends.
May you be good to them and may you be there for them;
may they bring you all the blessings, challenges, truth,
and light that you need for your journey.
May you never be isolated.
May you always be in the gentle nest of belonging with your
anam ċara.
— John O’Donohue (anam ċara means “soul friend”)

Things catching my eye this week:

This delightful video which popped up on my Instagram feed, is of a child, finally being able to see clearly, due to a new pair of glasses, and the joy which is so clear on her face, once she realizes she can see.
If you need to smile, take a look.

Until next time, as ever, may your angels and guides watch over you and protect you until we meet again.

Love and Light,

Tracy

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Until next time, bye for now.

Links:

Joy Video

Debbie Danon Newsletter

Big by Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer

The Cottage Substack

Anything in bold and underlined is a link to the relevant article or web page. None are affiliate links, just things I hope to benefit you, or people whom I admire and have worked with in the past.